Week 1 NFL! Is it the
best football weekend of the year?
Storylines have been brewing for 9 months for some teams. Yeah, yeah, I know, for your team it’s more
like 6 months. But for the rest of us,
week 1 is like someone in our family giving birth: 9 months of buildup. 9 months of anticipation. Fantasy draft day is like finding out the sex
of the baby. Then week 1 is the big
unveiling…only, in this case there is a much higher propensity for immediate disappointment
as the baby poops all over us right after it is born.
In my case this year it was the poop trifecta: My team got shut out at home against a
division rival, my fantasy team stumbled out of the gate, and my DFS bets all
bombed.
How about you, are you doing alright? Not only did the Patriots
take a dump on national television, but you also were hit with a stunning
defeat in week 1 of guess the lines:
z – 10 B – 8 S -
3
That’s right, I took you down! You did beat out poor Sal for second place,
but for now I have the championship belt!
Sorry, I think that’s the first time I ever won. I had to gloat while I had the chance. It’s good to have the league back! Even if it is everyone’s favorite punching
bag these days. And you! What are you trying to do to me? Your stance that pro sports are superior to
college might be what I view as one of your finest qualities. Then you jumped right out with your week 1
recap and hit me with a dagger in the chest… Something about maybe enjoying college
football more than the NFL this year. It
wasn’t much. You were mostly
joking. But the seed was planted.
You had a Chuck Klosterman podcast where you let him spout
off about his preference for college football and you didn’t totally go after him
about it. I get it, you’re the host. It’s not a good idea to belittle your guests
even when they bring incorrect takes.
But now this..I’d hate to see you turn your back on pro football, but if it’s
going to happen it can’t be at the dirty hands of college football. I won’t allow it!
Here’s the thing, the amount of intrigue associated with any
one sporting event is directly proportional to the amount of talent on the
field/court/rink/course/track/foam gymnastics mat/chess board/ whatever. Who would you rather watch, the Nets or the
Warriors? The Warriors are more
interesting to watch because they are more talented. We
were fascinated with the inaugural Dream Team for the same reason. Golf was more interesting with Tiger Woods at
his peak. The formula fits across all
sports. Even college football. Alabama vs. LSU is better than Florida
A&M vs. New Mexico.
Yet, even when you are watching Alabama/LSU what are you
watching? 5 or so NFL players, a half
dozen guys that will have a cup of tea in the NFL and 10 guys that have no
business on a pro football field. To use
the official Bill Simmons rating system: they’re not good. They just aren’t good.
“Can you believe the Florida St. RB ran for 275 yards??”
What does it mean?
It’s like getting excited about a high school kid scoring 100 points in
a 6th grade basketball game.
In the NFL when a player has a 95 yard touchdown run there is a baseline
level of excitement that you can count on.
When a guy jukes and leaves a defender in a puddle on the field it’s breathtaking
because we have a greater certainty that it’s not just a mirage.
What are we really looking for in sports entertainment? Do we just want to see a bunch of players
succeeding at a high frequency? If
that’s what we’re going to call “good football”, maybe college football is the
better choice. I’d rather watch the best guys go after each other regardless
of whether it is ugly or pretty. I’m not
saying college football is unwatchable.
If I have extra time and I sit down to check out a Saturday game, I’m
not saying I wouldn’t be entertained on some level, but if I had a choice
between the two it’s no contest.
College football is quaint.
It’s fun to support your alma mater or your hometown University. Games of the major programs are cultural
spectacles. I’ll even acknowledge they
are way better to attend as events.
But that’s what a college football season is: a series enormous live cultural
celebrations
As a sports league that you track and watch on T.V. for
entertainment value?
Eahh. Think of it like it’s the NBA
scrapping their model and starting from scratch:
Let’s go with 120 teams instead of 30 teams. We’ll funnel 95% of the talent to about 20 of
the teams. We’ll split everyone into different conferences with varying amounts
of teams in each conference and we’ll decide each conference champion
differently. Each team will play MOST of
the teams in their conference, but some of the conferences will be too big for
everyone to play each other. The teams
will play an 11 or 12 game schedule. The
really good teams will only have more than a slight chance of losing 3 or 4 of
the games. At the end of the season,
we’ll meet and pick four of the teams to play in a tournament to decide the
league champion. Half of the rest of the
teams can play an exhibition game for their postseason.
I don’t get the appeal.
It’s a hot mess. And to top it all off, the whole racket is run by the
NCAA. Yes, the NFL has plenty of warts,
but as organizations heading sports leagues go, the NCAA makes the NFL look
like a beauty queen.
String it all together and it just doesn’t add up. Sure the NFL has its gaffes, but they still
have the best players and the best regular season format. The trendy thing to do is to be disgusted by
the NFL, but let’s not get carried away.
If you’re looking for sports entertainment, it’s tough to beat. Do what you want. That’s just my two cents. As always, long live Bill Simmons.
-a fan
